Wednesday, March 16, 2011

What I Am Doing (and Why I am Doing It)

The last post got me thinking. What if I actually tried to do some of this stuff? Well, I already do some of this stuff, but I'm not consistent with most of it. And other things I don't do at all. The other thing that got me thinking was my college friend (I use the word loosely. I don't know if we ever spoke in college, but I read her blog now. I totally have a mom crush on her and we have a lot in common!), Melody, decided to do a 30 Things in 30 Days series, where she tries to...wait for a list of 30 things for 30 days. I know that was hard to follow. Anyway, it kind of motivated me too. I figured if she could do it, with two kids, one of whom is younger than Malachi, so could I.Mine hasn't been as organized as all that. I pick and choose what I want to do day to day. But let me tell you, not having the pressure of *having* to do these things because I said I would has made all the difference. Let me tell you what I've done in the last few days:
  • Cleaned out the fridge (I won't even tell you how long its been since that's happened. I'll just say it was on my Before Baby Arrives to do list, and it never got done).
  • Sorted through a bunch of junk to take to good will.
  • Created a junk drawer instead of a whole junk desk in our living room. Baby steps.
  • Put a little basket in the kitchen for random junk that piles up. So my put-away pile is all in one place instead of a bunch of stuff strewn about.
  • Read to Malachi a lot more --and he's really starting to like it!!!
  • Drank my water a lot more consistently (this one's really important for my milk supply, and I have really seen a difference).
  • Done the shakedown most days before Joshua gets home. Oh, you haven't heard of the shakedown? Well, let me help you. You'll love this, mommies.
  • Started drinking decaf. It's relaxing. It's a treat. It warms my insides. It makes me feel like I've got it together when I can manage to brew a cup of coffee during the day.
  • Worn real clothes during the day and bed clothes at night. (Novel thought!)
  • I have made a few cups of coffee for Joshua, and gotten together a few of his lunches.
  • I have napped during nap time less, bring it to rare instead of occasional. Which is how I've gotten all this stuff done!
  • I have more frequently had dinner on when Joshua comes home, instead of handing him Malachi when he walks in the door and starting it then.
  • I have done a much better job of keeping our living spaces clean and free of clutter. I'm finding myself picking up more throughout the day, but never feeling overwhelmed with the mess.
  • We've had people over several times in the last few days. The house has gotten increasingly more organized each time, and even after a party last Saturday night, I was able to get things back into shape pretty fast.
What else?...
  • More pampering for Joshua.
  • I've been flossing my teeth more. Not twice a day, but once, most days.
  • We've had more music playing.
  • I've done a little better about taking my meds, but it still needs to be more consistent. Maybe I can set an alarm.
  • I tried playing the guitar once, but Malachi was awake and sabotaged it. I'll try again during nap time.
  • I haven't gotten all the clothes off the floor yet, but some days I've been helping Joshua get an outfit together the night before, so that he doesn't wake Malachi up while looking for his belt or whatever.
  • I haven't had my phone on me, but I have found it is easier to locate it when there isn't a bunch of clutter around for it to get lost in. Amazing.
So I'm pretty tickled with myself. Just to be clear, my motivation is not perfection, or praise, or good feelings. It's this guy:

I was reading something a friend wrote on a forum that I frequent. I will summarize. I want my children to see an example of the kind of adult I want them to be when they grow up. I want him to see a capable, strong person with a balanced, well-managed life. I want them to see that I give myself and my family what we need to thrive, not just exist. I want them to see an example of servanthood. I want them to see that my life has the same priorities that I want for their lives. NOT that things should be clean. But that we take care of ourselves. We organize our lives in such a way that we can focus on our priorities.

After being pregnant for 9 months while working full time, and then having a baby, a lot of things fell by the wayside. You kind of get used to living a certain way. But now that season of my life is over (for a while...), I'm learning to make choices that will make us all feel better.

So, with that said, one area that I almost completely neglected in this list, is the self-care area. Aside from the coffee and the daytime clothes, I haven't made much progress in the goals that have to do with self-care.

What I'm realizing is that at this stage of my life, its not that I don't have time. I have managed to clean, organize, blog, watch television shows, hang out with friends, and still have time to spare. It's that for whatever reason, I put myself at the bottom of the list of priorities. I haven't gotten up early, read my books, played my music, had girl time, or incorporated the daily office. I have blogged a little, but I haven't posted what I've written yet. So, I want to work on that area.

This has been a good exercise for me. I thought I didn't have time, but I was wrong. I know there are people who really don't have time, but I'm not one of them. There are others like me, who have the time, and maybe just need to re-prioritize things a little. I have felt very positively about the changes I have made, like I'm really acting in life, not just reacting. That's a good feeling.


  1. I love this post! It is very motivating for me as a mom-to-be. THank you for sharing. And... good work!! You are a wonderful mom and wife, and you DESERVE to take care of yourself too!!

  2. Great job, Sandra!!!! It's so nice to feel like you have things under control. You're doing so well!

  3. Nicely written, I can certainly relate. I have a blog too at that is sadly neglected but I'm hoping to change that soon.